Cigarettes after sex

You are the drug I didn't know I needed
A complete disregard for the rising sun
As if my heart has never been broken
And summer nights would never end.

Time is just a place in my mind

Five years later, I have learned how to love myself.

I have also learned that as black and white coexist, our world holds so much contradiction, like how loving myself never stopped me from loving you.

Five years later.

Nothing really changes about love

I can't go online without looking you up, knowing very well what I see will hurt me. It doesn't stop me anymore, knowing that pain is inevitable. Like how I'd do it all over again if given a time machine, even now when I know we were meant to break. I've seen how this love break me to pieces and take me years to move on.
I'd still choose you all over again.

The hurt

I clicked on the wrong tab today. One with our last chat history opened. Angry words, bickering jealousy, restlessness, and sadness all came back at one. Suddenly the memories didn't seem so far away. Suddenly I felt hurt like it was only yesterday.

How did something beautiful like our love turn me into such an ugly person? Because I didn't have you, and you wouldn't have me?

Over it

To the boy who never loved me:

"I loved you anyway"

Now that you've forgotten what happened with us

What do I do, when all I tried to give was love, kindness, and respect, and all you gave in return were text messages that were never sent?

I was overcompensating for what, I don't know. I was trying to love you, forgive you, and then forget us. I shook myself up and left it behind, knowing that I tried my best.

Still, the lingering bitterness on my tongue reminds me that you didn't deserve it all.

We shall be friends no matter what

"You broke me"
"You were already broken before we met".